So, I live on the east coast. We just got dumped with a foot of snow and now it’s all gray and frozen. I almost ate shit walking out of my house.

When I was a kid, I used to love snow days. That meant no school. Now, as a grown up, I hate it. And because I work from home, I don’t get paid for snow days. I actually have to work. Now that I’ve lived here for almost 30 years now, I’m over this climate. It gets so hot during the summer and the humidity is offensive. And the winters are so cold that when the wind blows, it slaps you in the face. I don’t want to live in a place where the wind slaps me in the face…I refuse.

A lot of people (mostly Republicans) will turn their noses up at me when I mention that my mission is to die in San Diego. That’s right. Fucking San DIego. Right by the Pacific Ocean. I love the weather, I love the culture, I love the people…it’s where I belong.

You can’t blame me for wanting to die in one of the most beautiful places in the world.